5 Tips on Building Relationships For Your Success

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“If you give to others, you will be given a full amount in return. It will be packed down, shaken together, and spilling over into your lap. The way you treat others is the way you will be treated.”  —Luke 6:38 CEV


by DuBoix
by DuBoix

Recently, I’ve heard repeatedly if you want to succeed you must build relationships first. Here are five tips to ease your effort.

Tip 1: Relationships that improve your success must be genuine.

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I’m taking classes and reading blogs on marketing. The primary goal stressed is to build relationships. But immediately following that point is:


  • In working to build relationships, you must genuinely desire to help others. click to tweet

You must want the other person to succeed; you gladly do tasks for their benefit. In groups I belong to, this active support includes spending time praying for each other.

Building relationships falls apart if you expect help in return. You’ll get disgruntled when it doesn’t come in the manner you want. Resentfulness doesn’t feel like success.

“Instead of manipulating people for our own purposes, we help them achieve what is best for them. We also try to see life through their eyes. Treat others the way you would want them to treat you.” —Billy Graham

Tip 2: The more you do for others; the more others will do for you.

But the prize while forming this habit is that you grow to enjoy helping others. And watching them succeed. Your general care for others becomes personal and natural.

Tip 3: Being an extrovert or introvert has little to do with building relationships for your success.

I’ve learned it’s whether people charge you with energy or drain you of energy that classifies you as an extrovert or introvert. Not necessarily how talkative or shy you are. I’m an introvert but readily express myself one-on-one.

Regardless of type, you make genuine relationships one person at a time.

by luisrock62
by luisrock62

Tip 4: Strong family relationships are essential while you build relationships outside your household.

I think Billy Graham warns us well:

“We have exchanged love of family and home for cyberfriends and living in constant motion that robs the soul from memories – and perhaps from that still, small voice that longs to be heard. —Billy Graham


  • Building relationships for success starts in the family. click to tweet

Tip 5: You can’t do everything yourself.


  • Like it or not, we need others; we’d fail at probably 80% of what we do all alone. click to tweet
Image courtesy of bplanet / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Image courtesy of bplanet / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

My brother-in-law, a retired company executive, always noted his own weaknesses. Then he hired people who excelled in those weaknesses. He was more concerned about building relationships for success than feeling threatened by his staff.

Another example. I plan to make baskets of goodies related to the events and characters in my book. I’ll give them away at celebrations of my book release. I’ve had fun buying the goodies.

I’ve wondered how I’ll make the baskets look inviting. Then I remembered a lovely basket a church member made to collect notes and cards. We’ve developed a friendship though the prayers and bits of encouragement I’ve offered during a difficult time. I’ll ask her to help me. I picture me serving her lunch and us having fun packaging the baskets together.

What tips do you have about building relationships for success?

3 Steps to Create Mantras That Keep You Out of the Mire and Moving Forward

“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.”  — Philippians 4:8

file0002047565344.jpgYou want to stay focused on that “excellent or praiseworthy” thing you know you should be doing or thinking about, but your mind would rather flit to anything but.

Do you have a mantra? I’m talking about mantra in the sense of an instrument of focus, a set of words spoken frequently to get you to focus on your “excellent or praiseworthy” task or thinking.


  • Create several mantras to propel forward the “excellent or praiseworthy” tasks in your week.
    click to tweet

recite-13688-770466689-1rsv240.pngExample 1: Anytime a thought enters my mind that I know is detrimental to others or to me, my mantra is: “I will not receive that.” When I whip out this mantra, counting on God’s help, the undesirable thought always leaves me.

Example 2: When I want  to take a little detour before starting the goal I set for the morning, my mantra is: “First things first, always.” Then I promise myself I can take the detour when the goal is checked off my schedule.

id-100162370.jpgExample 3: On the other hand, a relaxing or fun activity between your goal-oriented tasks is important and fruitful. You may need a mantra to pull away from the mound of work. You might borrow the old saw, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” Just replace Jack with your name.


  • Have fun with these 3 simple steps to create mantras that will keep you moving forward.
    click to tweet

Step 1: Identify what usually prevents you from doing or thinking what’s “excellent or praiseworthy.”

Step 2: If someone else repeatedly used your tactics, what would you say (or want to say) to them?

Suppose your problem is dragging your feet in entering your workspace. You might want to say to your invisible twin: “Go into your office, turn your light on, and plant your derrière into your chair, bud.”

Step 3: Shorten it. Make it catchy to you. Repeatable.

chair.jpgYou might rewrite it to:  “Take a day off on your day off.” Or perhaps for a rhyme: “Derrière in the chair.” If necessary, add the “bud.”

You might want to rewrite the adage, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” Possibly, “Rest or be dull at best.”



  • Your mantras can pull you out of the sludge of unhelpful thoughts and unfruitful tasks.
    click to tweet

What are mantras you use to keep you from the mire of unfruitfulness?

3 Ways to Pay It Forward in Your Creative Career

“You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.” —John Wooden

id-100172390.jpgReview your journey in your creative career. Haven’t you received valuable nuggets from others who made a difference in your creative work? You’re thankful, but often repaying your benefactors is nearly impossible.

Then pay forward the help you received. You can help another struggling artist.

3 Ways to Pay It Forward

1. Tweets, posts, and links

id-10074109.jpgThis era of social media helps us pay forward what we’ve received.

In a tweet, a blog post, or other social media, we can share with others the nuggets that were so helpful to us.

Example: In an online course, I received a better understanding of writing in deep point of view. So, I shared what I learned in a recent blog post by sharing several of my homework examples. I directed people to the instructor’s website, her book on the subject, and her online course. Hopefully, several of my readers learned from my examples and were encouraged to buy the book or sign up for the instructor’s next class.

2. Reviews

When we like others’ work, taking the time to write honest online reviews is one of the best things we can do to help others’ in our field.


Example: An author invited others who enjoyed her book to join her promotion team. She said we could join her team for the purpose of learning how a promotion team works. I have a book coming out soon and wanted to learn how to implement such a team.

As I helped the author get the word out about her book, I learned much from her. She also took the time to promote several of my blog posts. On her team, I learned how to write reviews on Goodreads and Amazon. Now when I like a book, I promote it through writing honest reviews. Paying forward what the author did for me.

3. Mentors and teachers

id-10034692.jpgWhile I’ve grown in the craft of writing, I’m amazed at how many people have stepped up to help me. Mentoring others pays forward the help we receive from our mentors. Teaching classes or workshops, or simply sharing what we’ve learned with our critique groups pays it forward also.

Example: I moved into a small rural community. A woman in my new church gave me a newspaper clipping about a local writers’ group.

The president of the writers’ group is an editor for a small publishing company. She took me under her wing. She encourages me, alerts me to valuable writing information, sends me links to opportunities, and invites me to teach elements of the craft in our local group.

I’m happy to lead workshops to pay forward her help. I believe God used the woman in my church to provide me with this wonderful mentor.


  • You can pay forward the help you’ve received from others in your creative craft.
    click to tweet

How have you paid forward help you’ve received?